


Year 2000

by KillJoy998



Category: The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-05
Updated: 2014-02-22
Packaged: 2017-12-31 14:19:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 34
Words: 10,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1032689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KillJoy998/pseuds/KillJoy998
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>365 days is how long a year lasts, excluding a leap year, and so many days hold so many memories. Pip's just going to write them down and express his inner thoughts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Year 2000- School Sucks

Dear Diary, (January 6) 2000,

Hello again. Aye, the infamous Pip is back! I'm here to just express that school really sucks. I've mentioned that before, but trust me, you're lucky you are inanimate. That's a pretty big word for me, Frodo would be proud. 

Back to the point, school- Evil. The building just whirls you into Hell, literally if the big guys *cough * Boromir *cough * grab you and flush your face down a toilet. Luckily that's never happened to me, and hopefully it never will. I'm pretty popular at school, if I'm being honest, just about everyone likes me. I'm one of the biggest trouble makers there with my partner in crime by my side, Merry; I've mentioned him before.

Although being popular has its perks, school is still traumatic nevertheless. The toilets are always messy, they always have this sort of stench that makes me hold it in all day until I get home. 

Then there's the food at the cafeteria- none of it is decent whatsoever. The chocolate bars are always creamy and delicious though, but they're off limits for students, which is why Merry and I steal them when no one's looking.

Lessons, who likes lessons? I'm rubbish at maths, I'm alright at Science, but seriously, whenever the teacher tries to teach me something it always goes in one ear and out the other. I'm awful, and completely clueless. I have a short attention span, get extremely bored very easily and always thinking of more ways to get back at specific bullies. - You can tell school is a very very excruciatingly painful thing for me.

Now that school has started we have to catch up on homework we didn't do last year. 'We' includes Merry, me and Gimli. Frodo and Sam are always on top of their work and sometimes I get jealous.

Gimli hasn't been so bad at handing homework in at the end of last year, including these past few days; I suspect it's Legolas' fault. The kid always plays by the rules. Well, that I know of, anyway.

Hopefully something interesting will happen in the next few days so I have something actually interesting to share with you, but right now I have a specific time when I have to go to bed so I can get up early for school. 

I'll talk to you in a bit,  
\- Peregrin Took


	2. Year 2000- Merry's Fault for Definite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was Merry's fault Frodo and Sam got locked in a closet all night. It definitely was.

Dear Diary, (January 8) 2000,

All I have to say was that it wasn't my fault! It seriously wasn't, believe me! This probably sounds ridiculous right now, so I'll tell you what happened:

It was at lunch time, around twelve thirty, when my dear cousin Frodo got inline to get some food. Sam was right behind him, and they were just chatting like usual. 

I'll give you a bit of an insight, Frodo and Sam are the type of people who have known each other for years, who have loved each other for years, but seriously think that the other one doesn't fancy him. It's a pretty pathetic situation, and Merry and I have tried to get them together for AGES. 

What happened was all Merry's fault, I assure you. 

Merry and I were just chewing on our apples, I was simply sat on top of a table when my best friend jumped down, running straight for the dinner lady who was right next to Frodo. I rose and ran after him, but accidentally knocked into the lady, who surged forward, crashing into Frodo and Sam.

Now, I'm a pretty clumsy person, but this was nothing compared to what I'm usually like. They obviously started blaming me, groaning in displeasure. 

They were all covered in gravy and God knows what when Frodo cursed me. I was SO scared at the time (sarcasm, I'm not scared easily) but suddenly had an idea. I told them it would be a good idea to clean up and hauled Frodo to his feet, tugging him towards the "toilet". Merry clearly caught on, dragging Sam in the opposite direction.

We ended up fooling them, pushing them into a closet that the janitor doesn't even like himself. 

Alright, so the idea was that the two lovebirds weren't allowed to leave until they had proclaimed their undying love and make out. That didn't exactly go to plan, as when the door closed behind them, it locked automatically. It could only be unlocked on the inside, but the janitor had the key and he was NO WHERE to be seen.

I sort of feel bad for leaving them there, but since I couldn't risk another detention I had to hurry to class. It's easy to be said that I forgot all about them until now. I hope they got out okay...

I think it's easy to say I'm going to be feigning sick for the rest of the week.  
\- Peregrin Took


	3. Year 2000- Garbage Disaster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aragorn isn't very smooth with the ladies.

Dear Diary, (January 16), 2000,

It's safe, which is good, diary. Frodo and Sam got out okay, and I'm still alive, so I'm taking that as a sort of win. Merry said it was a failure, he's a bit of a pessimist.

Anyway, the relationship between the fools isn't the subject of this entry, it's more about the classic failure of Aragorn's "smooth moves" for the ladies. He's got this thing for a girl in a couple of years above me, Arwen, and he's kind of obsessed with the girl. She's pretty and all, but I never understood the way boys can just get hooked by women. 

Back to the point, I don't think Arwen will be reciprocating his feelings for a while. Why? I'm not an expert on lasses, but I'm pretty sure they don't like their men bathing in dirty rubbish cans filled with garbage.

I felt bad for Aragorn, because it was honestly accidental. He was sat on one of those high chairs, talking with Gimli and Legolas, the typical trio, when he decided he'll do some flirting with said female. She was walking by, and he was about to lean back in his chair and do some smooth talking with her, but it sort of went wrong.

He didn't exactly get to do his flirting, because Gimli and Legolas were engaged in one of their big explosive arguments that get physical. They hadn't actually thrown any punches yet, but they rocked the table, which resulted in Aragorn losing his balance and falling backwards, collapsing into a full garbage can, a bunch of packages swarming over him just as his "lucky" lady walked by.

It was pretty humiliating, but I can't say if he got to his flirting that it'd help. I've seen him flirt before and he's not exactly a smooth talker like he says he is.

Then again, maybe girls like that. I don't know. 

\- Peregrin Took


	4. Year 2000- Food Fight!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another fight between Legolas and Gimli.

Dear Diary, (January 20) 2000,

Hell broke loose today. Well, in a very intriguing, delicious kind of way. It was Gimli and Legolas again. There's too much sexual tension between them, but I'm glad this time this fight wasn't exactly dangerous. Normally their fights included arrows and a few swords in the hidden gym for special PE lessons. This time it was purely food in the cafeteria.

Don't ask me why the fight broke out, because I was engaged in an interesting conversation with Frodo, Sam and Merry. All I knew was that a donut had flew past us and hit Gimli.

Everyone had frozen, it was like time had stopped. Gimli had fought back, grabbed an opened yoghurt and squirted it all over Legolas. You could hear a penny drop, but then everything had busted into life, Legolas threw some spaghetti at him, and the shorter boy had chucked God knows what at the blonde.

Everyone joined in. All the food had gone, the whole cafe was completely covered in liquid and desserts and different types of food. 

No one got stopped, no one even bothered to tell them off. NO ONE tells Legolas Greenleaf what to do, and no one has even tried to scold Gimli. Both of them are skilled fighters and VERY stubborn.

The fight was fun though, it was hilarious, at least I enjoyed it.

Between you and me, the scowls on the culprits faces turned into amusement and awe after a while, and honestly I just wanted them to kiss. It'll happen one day, and I'll tell you I told you so.

\- Peregrin Took


	5. Year 2000- Argument

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Home problems.

Dear Diary, (January 26), 2000,

I cried. I cry a lot, to be fair, but this time it had good reason. Dad had slapped mum again. She doesn't deserve it, I don't think, but I'm not allowed to know what happens with my parents anymore. I'm "too young" and should focus on my school work.

It stresses me out, when mum starts crying and then suddenly I burst out in tears. I hide in my room when they argue. Dad had threatened to smash an alcohol bottle on her head to knock her out. He's never done it, yet.

He would, I bet he would. The thing is, I drink a lot too. Too much for a guy my age. It's not my fault, actually no it is my fault. Completely my decision. I've been drunk before but I'm glad to say that I'm nothing like my dad when I'm not sober. I'm fun and energetic whilst father is dark and aggressive. 

Mother has thought about leaving him, but I doubt that'd happen.

I'm scared though, I'm frightened of my dad, but Merry has always told me I could go live with him if something really bad did happen. Merry has always been my hero, he's never let me down.

I won't go and live with the Brandybuck's though, I'd hate to be a burden, even though Merry has told me that I'm welcome over there and that I'm a joy to be around, you can tell why he's my favourite person.

Hopefully my parents' arguments will die down for a while. I won't be able to take it otherwise.

\- Peregrin Took


	6. Year 2000- Adventures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Visit to Bilbo's.

Dear Diary, (1 February) 2000,

We visited Bilbo's at the weekend. It was nice, to gather around the fire, have hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows, sharing tales and stories.

Frodo has an obsession with adventures, and Bilbo is more than happy to share his own with us. Some were funny and really entertaining, but others were upsetting and you had to feel bad for the old guy. We all love Bilbo and he's been in some very dangerous situations.

You'd think that'd throw Frodo off guard, but he's still set on leaving this place and going to wherever. He craves the thing most of us just dismiss so easily. I'm content here, sure having an adventure would be fun, but I can find fun in setting off fireworks, going trick-or-treating, stealing from the local farmer and causing mischief locally. I'm glad Merry agrees with me.

We'll stick together when Frodo leaves. I've got full faith that Sam will follow my cousin happily. It's nice, to know Sam is forever loyal to Frodo. My cousin needs someone to slap him when he's in the wrong.

Bilbo wouldn't do it, though he'd scold Frodo when its needed. My family is quite odd.

Luckily Merry and I love listening, but the adventures mentioned are not exactly what we want to do. They're amazing and impressing and God, our uncle has been through a lot. It's something to admire.

\- Peregrin Took


	7. Year 2000- Speeches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip got given a death speech.

Dear Diary, (February 5) 2000,

That was one of the weirdest family meetings I've ever attended. First of all, there was no buffet. That was a bummer, I had a big appetite that afternoon, I was looking forward to it. No, but seriously, one of my distant aunties came to it, and she took me into a private room.

At first I thought I was going to be scolded again. I get told off a lot from my family, it's an unofficial tradition were every year one family member takes me away to scold me in some way, I'm pretty sure most of my family members are looking forward to their turn.

But fortunately it wasn't anything to do with discipline. It involved death instead. Yes, you read correctly, it was about the end of my life.

She told me that life is something we need to cherish, and on our deathbed we need to be able to say we did everything we want to do before our time ends. But that's a load of bull, because you could die right on the spot, like before you jump out of the plane. You didn't fulfill your wish then.

She scolded me THEN when I shared my view, because she didn't like the sound of me doing something so dangerous. Now that got my attention, because I never mentioned ME. I wouldn't jump out of a plane anyway, seems too scary. You could die from nerves as soon as you look down. That wouldn't be good.

After the speech I got thinking, what DO I want to do with my life? I realised then that I have no ambitions for the future, which might not go down well. It sort of sucks, to be honest, because I know my older cousin Frodo will never have to lift a finger. He'll never have to do any work whatsoever.

I'm going to have to do some hard thinking on this whole bucket list thing, and when I think of something you'll be the first to know.

\- Peregrin Took


	8. Year 2000- Dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's four days away from Valentines Day, and Pip just wants fun.

Dear Diary, (February 10) 2000,

Ugh. Its this time of year again. All the girls aren't concentrating, they're all drooling over certain guys (including me) and just waiting to get asked that glorious question.

Well, its glorious to them, to me it's pretty lame. Valentines Day is soon, and our school hosts a Valentine Dance were the boys ask girls to be their Valentine, which is just a date for the dance. Nothing good ever happens at these "parties", although the girls are pretty hooked with the idea.

I don't really like it, since boys only ask the pretty girls out, and the "ugly"ones have to go alone. The Dance only shows who's hot and who's not. That's it. Pathetic.

It was painful to watch Aragorn stutter his way through the question to Arwen, which I think is more fitting, because Aragorn doesn't only like Arwen for her looks. He was really nervous though, and that's odd because he's "Mr Cool" - he keeps trying to get people to call him that regularly, its never caught on- but today he was the complete opposite.

It was sweet though, because she said yes; either Arwen isn't even bothered by the garbage mishap or she just felt sorry for him. 

They are admittedly the couple that could really work though, like they say, opposites attract.

Frodo and Sam don't have dates, but that's obvious, and Merry and I have been trying to persuade one of them to ask the other. Hopefully they'll get the message.

I'm not going with a date, it'll just be Merry and I. It's always been us two, and we're completely fine with that. We'll see how this Dance goes.

It can't be that awful, right?

\- Peregrin Took


	9. Year 2000- Valentines Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, it's Valentines Day, isn't it?

Dear Diary, (February 14) 2000,

Okay, THAT could have gone better. Why? I'll tell you.

The day started off very badly, father had given mother a bouquet during breakfast, but they must have skipped the basic learning about each other when they first started dating, because she was very highly allergic to the flowers. The worst part was that dad didn't even seem too concerned. I expected as much though.

So for the first half an hour of me awake this morning included me calling an ambulance. We got to the hospital pretty quick, but it still made me late for school. I got ANOTHER detention, because the teacher didn't believe my excuse. I was disappointed to say the least.

Anyway, things didn't really pick up after that, because Faramir had passed me a candy bar during class and I happily ate it, but I soon felt sick afterwards. I threw up in the boys toilets fifteen minutes later. I need to check the fine print in the future, because it was a few months outdated, which is saying something, because chocolate never goes out of date.

The next thing that happened was at lunch, when everyone was fussing over their hair and make up and making themselves look "presentable", as the full afternoon was dedicated to the stupid Valentine Dance. The cafe was crowded and louder than usual. I should have expected it, but Merry made me skip lunch, which was possibly the worst bit of my day.

Diamond had asked me to ask her to be my Valentine, because she had said no to all the boys, as she was waiting for ME to ask her. Di is a great friend and all, but I never saw her in that light. I was thinking of just going along with it to not let her down, but then I remembered Merry, and I knew I'd feel guilty if I turned him down. I think I broke her heart, she was in tears for the rest of the night.

As if that wasn't bad enough, when the Dance had started, forty minutes later the electricity went out, which meant the lights and music wouldn't work at all. 

It was considerably the worst day of my life, but on the bright side was that I can stay the night at Merry's to make up for it from my parents, and I'm pretty sure I saw Frodo tug Sam out the hall where the Dance was kept when it was in full swing, and I sort of wish they did what I think they did. 

Legolas and Gimli seemed to have a good time, which was fortunate, and Arwen was still smiling when the night was over. I think Aragorn might be as cool and smooth as he says he is. 

I wouldn't be surprised.

\- Peregrin Took


	10. Year 2000- Bonkers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip reflects on his family, and how bonkers they all are.

Dear Diary, (February 17th) 2000,

Frodo still won't tell me what happened three days ago. It's really bugging me for some reason, but that's only because I'm dying to know if the two lovebirds have finally got together. They've always acted like a couple, ever since they met, so it's hard to tell if it's actually real or not. Maybe it is to them, but not for reality? If you get my meaning.

Never mind, Frodo still needs his Sam no matter what. Sam is practically the sane half of Frodo. Most of my older cousin is pure insanity. He's a bit wrong in the head sometimes, he can be very dangerous. That's hardly ever though, so I don't think he'll have any problems in the future. Still, he gets his insanity from Bilbo for sure. Bilbo Baggins- or "Mad Baggins" as they call him- has been through so much in his life, and really, can you blame the old man for having a few screws loose? I know I can't. I'd like to see some of these locals go through what Bilbo did, and see if they came out the other side as fit as a fiddle. I highly doubt it. 

Now that I think of it, my family have always been a bit loopy. My dad has anger issues and mentally unstable most of the time, and all my mother does is cry all the time. No offence to her, because I love my mother, but sometimes she can be a bit too sensitive. Us Took's are known for our mischief and nosiness, always on the run and doing something FUN. 

Merry's fun, although the Brandybuck's are a bit plainer than us. They have lots of fishing experience though, Merry is VERY good at fishing. I try to keep up with it all but end up sitting there with a rod with no bait, pretending I know everything. 

Most of my family are unstable-witty-too-many-screws-loose bonkers. 

It's fine though, because I fit right in.

\- Peregrin Took


	11. Year 2000- Swimming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip talks about how he can swim, and that Sam can't. Its fine though, because it won't come in handy anytime soon.

Dear Diary, (February 21) 2000,

Okay, alright, I can swim. It's easy, right? I mean, just swimming. We were swimming today in school, as I guess you could have worked out by now. I like it, it's fun. 

I learned how to swim ages ago. My father taught me the basics, the doggie paddle and the breaststroke, but it was Merry who gave me the confidence of being able to go under water. That was a long time ago, when I questioned just how much the Brandybuck's spend time in/with water. I mean, all of them can swim perfectly before they are seven, and they are practically the best fishermen there are.

Nevertheless, it was pretty fun to be able to just mess around with Merry, Frodo and Sam, since nearly all of us could swim anyway. We didn't do much of the written work afterwards about water safety either. 

Sam is older than me, and yet he can't swim. We just told the teacher he could swim so we all got out of doing the actual activity. But seriously, he honestly can't swim, and maybe we should have made him go with the teacher and other students so he could have learned.

It's a pretty important skill to have, wouldn't you agree?

Oh well, he won't need it anytime soon anyway.

\- Peregrin Took


	12. Year 2000- Tag Rugby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The guys played rugby, but it wasn't rugby, but it had it's name on the game title.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We played Tag Rugby at school today. I hayed it so much, I hate sport in general, but TR is the worst.

Dear Diary, (February 26) 2000,

We didn't swim today. We played the most infuriating game there is. I'm not calling it rugby, I refuse to call it rugby. Then again, there isn't much else to name it. Ugh. Fine. We played Tag Rugby.

Gimli absolutely loved this game, and Legolas was really swift and graceful on the field, no one caught him. 

You see, to play this game you need two teams, both teams have five tags on a belt, or tucked into your trousers, and you have a ball. The team that starts with the ball has to go all the way towards the other end of the field and place the ball down at the cone, scoring. But the opposite team has to run after you and snatch a tag. Once a tag has been removed from the belt or waist, the person with the tag has to give it back to the person with the ball, before that person has to pass it back to a team mate and the game continues.

The same team keeps the ball no matter what unless five tags have been removed, so basically you have five lives before the other team gets the ball.

I hate that game, no one got my tags because I never had the ball. I'm not complaining, sports aren't really my thing, I like baseball though, and I like to bowl. That doesn't really count, but who cares?

Frodo was good at it, Merry had sat out- feigned an illness, the lying cheeky bastard- and Sam wasn't really paying attention. I think he was more interested in watching Frodo.

I think that concludes my suspicion, and I'm happy to say he's dating my cousin. 

\- Peregrin Took


	13. Year 2000- Buffets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pippin miraculously ate too much food, and suffers the consequence.

Dear Diary, (March 1) 2000,

My belly hurts. My stomach really REALLY hurts. I- can't believe I'm saying this- ate too much food. TOO MUCH. I deemed it impossible for me to be full, for me to be in agonizing pain because I took more stuff in than I can carry, but it's true. I was finally defeated.

We was celebrating God knows what, and went to a Chinese buffet. You see, the beauty of buffets is that you pay once, and then you can eat absolutely anything you want and for how many times you want. I used to love buffets, but now I'm not so keen.

I only had four platefuls of food, then a bit of ice cream and cake for dessert. I've never been so full in my entire life. I don't even know why my stomach couldn't hold the same amount as last time. 

The last time we went I could eat six plates and I would be still hungry. I don't know what happened today.

I do know one thing though, I REALLY hate buffets now. Remind me to never go to another buffet again, or if I get forced to go, make sure I only eat two plates worth of food, and then another one for dessert. Only three plates.

That's ridiculous, you're inanimate, you can't remind me to do anything. I may finally be going insane.

Anyway, since you can't do it, I'll have to make myself only eat what I can and not cram more in. Self control.

I'm doomed.

\- Peregrin Took


	14. Year 2000- Lazy Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip didn't do much, just had a nice lazy Sunday.

Dear Diary, (March 5) 2000,

Today was actually very peaceful. Father kept his comments to himself, mother tried her hardest to do stuff that didn't provoke dad-luckily nothing bothered him- and I just laid in my bed with a hot chocolate and some snacks. 

I have a TV in my room, so I had full entertainment for the entire day, and nothing bad happened. It was the first day in ages were I had relaxed fully and had no worries whatsoever.

One thing that would've made it better was if Merry was there with me. Then again, Merry makes everything better. It seems I've gone a bit soppy for my cousin- which means NOTHING. It seriously doesn't. I mean... This is... It would be absurd, right? Father would certainly disapprove.

AND SO WOULD I!

Ugh. No matter, I don't have to prove anything to you.

Anyway, relaxation, it was good- fantastic. I won't have a day like that again for a while. I'll have more time for stress than relaxing. I'm not looking forward to that.

\- Peregrin Took


	15. Year 2000- Vomit and Sickness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip got ill right after lunch, something that he's really unhappy about. He's the only one sour though, because Sam NEVER gets sick apparently.

Dear Diary, (March 10) 2000,

I threw up today, and consequently my stomach has been hurting ever since. I hate being ill, and luckily I'm hardly ever sick or diseased. I normally have a very good immune system, but sometimes my body fails me and I have days like today.

I was really disappointed too because I vomited right after I had ate my delicious dinner. Trust me, I'd never describe the school's food as being delicious, but somehow today it actually was. It's strange to think that way, but the hot dinner really got to me and it made me appreciate school cooks for the first time in my entire life, which scared me.

But then again, it couldn't have been that good, because I can't remember what it was in the first place. Never mind though, because it was still a good meal and it lifted my spirits... Before I threw up, that is.

I haven't eaten since then, and I've thrown up a couple times since. I hate being ill, have I mentioned that already? I probably have, knowing me.

I've never seen Merry get ill, and come to think of it Sam never gets sick either. Frodo has the worst immune system out of all of us, and he's sick nearly twice every month. Its fine though, because somehow Sam knows how to nurse him back to his full health.

It's strange, and I'll have to remember to ask for tips.

\- Peregrin Took


	16. Year 2000- Legolas' Illness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip ponders about Legolas' supposed serious illness.

Dear Diary, (March 15) 2000,

My sickness past and I'm perfectly fine, truly healthy. It's not really a big shock is it? You probably knew I'd get better. Never mind. There must be some sort of bug going round though honestly, because Legolas was sick in tutor, and after he left for home Gimli got really worried.

Well, the last part goes without saying, but it was still odd to see him panic slightly, and he wasn't himself for the rest of the day. Hopefully he'll be back to his old self tomorrow, but that will only happen if Legolas is suddenly better. I highly doubt that though because he was really pale- more so then usual- and couldn't talk, and just looked incredibly weak. Now that I think about it, his vomit wasn't exactly... Natural, we'll say, and the fact that he showed the symptoms above, and could hardly walk, this could be serious and not just a common bug.

I'm getting concerned for that boy if I'm being honest, as Legolas is usually so perky and elegant and is hardly ever ill, and NEVER as serious as this illness seems to be. 

I couldn't show my worry today though because Gimli needed all the support and encouragement he could get. Merry tried to console him, and Sam-bless him- tried with all his might to get Gimli to calm down and see that Legolas has always been a fighter, and can get through whatever this was.

Sam seemed so convincing, and I truthfully hope he's right. 

We'll see soon, I guess, and maybe Gimli will realise how precious Legolas is to him from this. 

\- Peregrin Took


	17. Year 2000- Tragic Potential Situation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Legolas could be dying but no one would know.

Dear Diary, (March 22) 2000,

Remember when I said I was worried seven days ago? Yeah, well, triple the word meaning and you may get to where I am right now. Legolas hasn't been at school or in anyone's sight - except for parents and siblings at home- for a WEEK. No information gets out of that house of his, because the family is so reserved, and no one at school knows anything about Legolas' health. 

Gimli is going out of his mind, literally, and has begun to fall to Rock Bottom. Its odd, as this is the first time they've been parted for YEARS. That gets to you, clearly, and Gimli is sort of having withdrawal symptoms.

I might not be nearly as frightened for Legolas as Gimli is, but I'm still worried sick about the situation. Legolas is the sort of guy who you know has a true heart, and will do some marvelous stuff for the dreadful world we live in, and who will live until they're a hundred or whatever. If he dies before he reaches his nineteenth birthday we're all doomed.

And suddenly I've got a feeling you may need to quadruple the meaning to get to where I am now that I've wrote that. What if Legolas actually died from this? He must be getting even weaker, and knowing him he won't be eating anything. This could be incredibly serious, and we wouldn't know, because no one in his family is willing to share details.

I'm scared to think what would happen if our favourite Greenleaf does die. A part of Gimli would be gone and he'd never be the same, Aragorn would not take lightly to the death either, and the two of them would be distraught, Gimli might even go into depression.

Okay, if this wasn't serious before it definitely is now. Oh God, why is everything so awful now? One tragic happening destroys far too many people in the aftermath. It's just horrible. 

I REALLY hope Legolas gets better.

\- Peregrin Took


	18. Year 2000- Broke in Half

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip's most probably failed a lame maths test, but that's not even nearly important compared to... Another situation.

Dear Diary, (March 28) 2000,

We had a maths test today, but it was only a foundation paper because they didn't think we'd know everything on the higher paper since they haven't taught us everything yet. Its pretty ridiculous, giving us a test that counts in our actual grade even though they haven't even finished teaching us yet. I'm pretty sure I failed, I couldn't even concentrate.

Legolas STILL isn't back, and I'm starting to feel nauseous again at the thought of a dead Legolas. I kept thinking about him and if he's dead right now and no one outside the family even knows. I'm not even religious, but I'd pray for him any day.

Gimli cries when he thinks no one's looking. No one thinks less of him for it, not even Boromir, they all think he needs to let it out. Maybe they're right, I'd cry if Sam/Frodo/Merry was dying. I'd probably do stuff that was worse than crying- like harming myself, or making sure I died too.

The truth is, I doubt I could live without them. I can't even talk about the subject much, so don't expect me to be talking about the imaginary deaths of my friends.

People outside of school say that Gimli is being ridiculous, and when - they didn't say if- Legolas dies, a half of Gimli won't die with him, and that he'll still be whole and nothing will happen. Those guys are jerks though, because I understand why Gimli is so depressed about the situation. If it were Merry, half of me would die too. I couldn't be able to live without him at all, and I'm not even bothered that I've spilled most of my heart to you.

So really, if Legolas... Does die - how can I even say it?- I'm pretty certain there'll be two funerals instead of one.

\- Peregrin Took


	19. Year 2000- Life's Unfair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life just is so unfair, and Pip has a list of reasons why.

Dear Diary, (April 2) 2000,

I'm meant to be asleep, this wasn't supposed to be my diary entry night, but I just got so scared that I needed someone to turn to-or in this case, something. I'm sorry if that offended you, I'm just in a desperate sour mood.

School hasn't gone any smoother, although I'm looking forward to the Easter Holidays. I used to be a big fan of Easter, eating loads of chocolate, but honestly I think I've lost my appetite until Legolas recovers from this illness he suffers from. I'm going to try and direct the entries away from him though, so its less depressing, although I'm still frightened about it all.

Anyway, like I said, a break from school will happen soon, and we'll have days that have nothing to do with boring education. Frodo will most likely spend the time with Bilbo, and probably he'll bring Sam to tag along. 

It used to be a tradition, that us four would head over to Uncle Bilbo's and play hide and seek with each other whilst Bilbo hid the eggs so we could have an egg hunt. It was so cool.

I don't think I'll be celebrating this year, because everything has gone so wrong. Father kept up his constant beating with poor mother, I really wish I could stop being the coward I am so I could stop him, or get someone else to stop him. I haven't spoken to Diamond since the Valentine Dance and it pained me to see her so upset, but I guess its better this way, however I don't think I'm meant to be in love with my COUSIN, my grades are dropping, Bilbo is aging and I fear he may pass away soon - which would leave disastrous results for Frodo- and Legolas could be dying!

Ugh! Why is life so unfair?!

\- Peregrin Took


	20. Year 2000- It Always Comes Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip enjoys his easy day, but life isn't easy anymore when the worries just keep coming back.

Dear Diary, (April 6) 2000,

Today was a great relief for me. Just a calm Saturday, and dad was out of the house, no homework had to be completed, and it was just me and my mum which was gratefully peaceful.

We spent the day cooking cakes for my younger cousins. I'm a pretty good cook, to be honest, and I did most of the work while my mother concentrated on the decoration for them. I had nearly a full bowl of extra buttercream, which truthfully made me feel a bit sick, but it was completely worth it. It just tasted so good.

Why is all the good tasty food out there unhealthy? All the healthy stuff tastes horrendous. It's just ridiculous. People would be so much healthier if all the actual healthy stuff tasted a bit more than decent. You agree, right? Well, you can't, but honestly you can understand my logic even though you can't actually eat anything.

Of course you'd understand my logic, you're smart. I mean, your paper comes from trees and trees photosynthesize automatically which is very clever, since photosynthesis is a very complicated procedure.

I bet you've guessed I'm just rambling now. I'm sorry, but now my pleasant worry free day is over, and my concerns and stress are coming back.

My worries will undoubtedly come back tomorrow though, and all the days after that, so be prepared because no one has heard of anything to do with our Archer, and I'm getting more worried than I'd like to admit.

\- Peregrin Took


	21. Year 2000- Drownable Chocolate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The school breaks off for the Easter Holidays, and Pip just wants some good to come out of it.

Dear Diary, (April 12) 2000,

They gave us chocolates today, since it's the last day of school before the holidays. I can honestly say I'd rather be at school. I know that sounds absurd coming from me but I really don't want to stay at home for a couple of weeks no matter how much chocolate I receive. Why? Because my mum won't even be here for the time off, she's on some business deal or whatever.

I seriously can't stand being in that house for fourteen days with only me and dad. There's absolutely NO WAY I can do it. 

I'm just so glad the Brandybuck's don't live that far away. Maybe I could convince them to let me stay with them for Easter. I wouldn't be a bother... Well, I would, but no more than usual. They can handle it, they always could.

The thing is, I like to go to school to be able to talk to everyone. I mean, I don't have a phone- if I want one I have to buy one myself and I seriously don't have money- so I can't text anyone, and its really frustrating not being able to see anyone in two weeks. 

Well, a lot could happen in these next two weeks, and I really hope it's all positive.Legolas better get better, and I honestly don't see that happening- we need hope. I think Frodo's ill again, but that's nothing to concern over, because I've mentioned previously he's sick nearly twice every month or whatever.

Oh well, good things better happen, but if not, I can just drown myself in chocolate.

\- Peregrin Took


	22. Year 2000- Permission Granted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip got permission to stay at Merry's house for the holiday, and he really tries to push down his grief.

Dear Diary, (April 17) 2000,

Yes! This is my forth night staying at the Brandybuck's house! I would've told you sooner but I'm ashamed I lost you. I honestly thought I left you back at home by accident, but I finally found you at the bottom of my bag. 

Anyway, I get to spend the rest of the Easter Holiday with Merry and I honestly couldn't be any happier. His family is so sweet, understanding and have a great sense of humour. I don't know why I said 'his' family, because he's my cousin, and I'm their nephew, so they are my family too.

Back to the point, its only been four days since I got here and it's already becoming my favorite holiday. I think that's because its the first time I've celebrated something with only Merry with me. It's normally us, Sam and Frodo, but them two are at Bilbo's- "baking".

We're going fishing tomorrow and I can finally put the skills I've learned from Merry to good use. Remember when I told you I can't fish? Well, I can now! It's actually pretty easy now that I've got the hang of it.

Last thing I want to tell you before carrying on, I doubt I'll be mentioning Legolas in any of these upcoming entries, to try and tone down my grief when the kid isn't even dying. I hope. 

When we get back at school there's no doubt my worry will come back, but for now I'm gonna focus on Merry.

\- Peregrin Took


	23. Year 2000- Baggins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frodo is very highly respected, and even though Frodo gets the most attention and more people sucking up to him, it's all fine. Pip has Merry.

Dear Diary, (April 19) 2000,

Our little cousins came to collect their Easter Eggs from my aunty and uncle- Merry's parents- today. It was fun, because I started a game of tag with them, and Merry joined in. I think it lasted for about two and a half hours. It was fun though, mainly because Merry's garden is so big and it had a wonderful space for running around.

I challenged Merry to a wrestling match too, which all the kids watched, and it actually got pretty heated. I was quicker with my movements, but he's stronger than me, so it took time for there to be an actual winner. In the end Merry won and I actually don't care.

These past few days have been heaven for me and honestly I think it's because I see Merry day and night and we're never apart. I'm pretty sure my mother had talked to his mum about our closeness, and everyone benefits more when we're together. That's actuallytrue. Frodo agrees too, and when Frodo thinks something, then everyone agrees.

You see, everyone knows who the Baggins are. They are immensely rich and are very high up, it's essential to be in their good books. When Frodo is old enough, he'll inherit Bag End and all the money and everything that comes with it. 

This means my dear cousin is highly respected and everyone is basically a sheep- follows whatever he does and repeats everything he says.

All the 'commoners' try and be good friends with Frodo, and a lot of them suck up to him like he's the King or whatever.

He hates it, poor guy, but he has to live with it. Took's are also very high up, since we're part of the same family, but so is the Brandybuck's, and it's always been the Baggins with the most money/respect/fame.

Fine by me, as long as I have Merry, I'm perfectly fine.

\- Peregrin Took


	24. Year 2000- Easter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip went through Easter without Sam and Frodo, and he got to the other side. He's still hungry though.

Dear Diary, (April 24) 2000,

Happy Easter! I have just calmed down from this high sugar rush! Merry's still awake too, but he's gone to get some water and the rest of our chocolate, so I figure it's the best time to get this entry over with before he gets back.

Today was actually really bright and sunny and amusing and chocolaty and I need to stop putting a connective between adjectives. Still, I mean what I wrote. 

It started off on a high, if I do say so myself. My aunty made pancakes for breakfast- which were so much nicer than they ought have been- and it sort of took off from there. Our younger cousins came at around eleven and just as I presumed, we had an Easter Egg Hunt. In the end me and Merry teamed up. We didn't win all the eggs, but when we combined our winnings together we had a pretty hefty load.

We only ate three each today- which may seem a lot to you, but honestly it's not enough for me. Which is why when Merry comes back we'll be eating some more chocolate and stay up even later. It'll be fine though, it always is.

I wonder what went on for Sam and Frodo. Bilbo couldn't have done much. He's getting on in age, if I'm honest, but Frodo doesn't like talking about that. We try and not mention anything to do with death near him, especially when Bilbo is involved. It'll be very hard on him when the time comes and truthfully I'd rather not ponder on that.

Anyway, like I said, I'm still pretty hungry, even after the little party that took place after the Hunt. Oh well. I'm used to it.

Nothing else really happened, we're not religious, so no prayers nor wishing took place. It was a simple gathering packed with family fun. I'll be looking forward to the next holiday. 

\- Peregrin Took


	25. Year 2000- A Message Through Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> School will be starting up soon, and when it does Frodo and Sam will receive lots of teasing from Pip and Merry.

Dear Diary, (April 27) 2000,

School will start up soon, and honestly I'm just gonna miss not being able to live with Merry. He's just... I can't describe him. I dont think ANYONE could describe him. 

The thing is, I'm gonna have to do some serious studying when I get back at home. I haven't as so much even mentioned work here at the Brandybuck's, and I've got quite a few tests after the first week back at school. I haven't even started anything related to studying yet, which sucks, because I dont want to spend the rest of my holiday drowning in books.

It's my fault, I suppose. I'm the one who didn't do the work in the first place. Sue me.

Please don't, even though I'm not quite sure why you would... Or HOW you would. You're a book. Just pages of inanimate paper. 

I think I've descended into madness, don't you agree? It'll be fine, Frodo is on a similar page as me, I suppose. Nothing wrong with that really, because Frodo is someone people should- and they do- admire. He stands for equality, peace... Etc. Kinda like Martin Luther King, except my cousin isn't as great as Luther. I think that goes without saying.

Never mind, Frodo is greater than a lot of people, and everyone still adores him. People will be rather shocked and angry when they find out their role model- yes, people take on board what Frodo says/does/wears, and my cousin despises it- is rather smitten with the local gardener's son. It sounds like some sort of Disney love story with a powerful message.

Merry would take delight on that. I should tell him about it, and we'll be prepared to do lots of teasing when we see them both back at school.

It'll be a nice uplifting vibe instead of a dark descending one for once. Can't wait.

\- Peregrin Took


	26. Year 2000- Hopefully False Engagement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip expresses his hate for school work, as well as the fact that teenagers just should not be married.

Dear Diary, (May 1) 2000,

I've moved back at home now, and school has started. I'm gonna really miss not doing anything and everything. I'll just be sitting through pointless lessons that I won't remember an hour after and when I'm back at home I'll have to be hitting the books. Ugh. Why does life hate me?

We saw Frodo and Sam yesterday and took great delight in teasing them and joking around. They didn't hate us for it, and laughed along when they really couldn't hold it in any longer. 

We saw Arwen as well, and she was holding a beautiful bouquet of her favorite flowers. We all instantly knew who they were from, and there's been a rumour going around that they're engaged to each other. I highly doubt it. I'm going to have to ask Aragorn just to be sure. I hope they're not engaged. I know that probably sounds really mean but I just think they're a bit too young. I have no doubt that they'll be together forever and all that crap, but having that sort of commitment as a teenager just shouldn't be allowed.

Oh well, that's just my opinion. I think Frodo feels the same about the subject, and I'm glad I'm not the only one.

I have to close off this entry quite short, because it's nearly midnight, and I have a history report due in tomorrow that's only half done.

I hate school so so so so so much.

\- Peregrin Took


	27. Year 2000- Wedding Food

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip believes couples can love each other without God, but the food at weddings is something no one should miss out on.

Dear Diary, (May 6) 2000,

Alright, Aragorn is not engaged. No one is getting married, thank God. I quite like weddings though, to be honest, which may seem bad. I've only been to a couple, Frodo has been to loads, most of them when he was a little kid. I think he's been to them all because he's the heir-sort of- and man of the family.

Weddings are pretty cool though, except that the couple are there for God's blessing. I think that's wrong. If God is real or not, couples still should feel like they can love each other and spend the rest of their days together happily without God's permission/approval. 

The party afterwards is great. Weddings always have MASSIVE cakes! There's just so much FOOD! God, why do I love everything unhealthy? I mean, anything healthy has no flavour, it's disgusting.

Anyway, our PE teacher has been replaced and I actually don't know why. I wasn't fond of her, but she was an alright teacher I suppose. Mind you, she might have actually resigned instead, because everyone knows how much she hates us. It's pretty amusing honestly.

Other than that, nothing has changed. It's all the same as before.

I haven't seen Legolas lately... I REALLY hope he's okay. I bet in a couple of weeks he'll show up as fit as a fiddle and act like nothing had happened. It'll be a nice blow over if that does happen.

I know Gimli will be pleased anyway, that's for sure.

\- Peregrin Took


	28. Year 2000- Too Much Pressure On The Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pippin expresses his thoughts on the pressure of school and GCSE's. Sam's birthday is coming up in a few days and he's not letting go of Merry anytime soon.

Dear Diary, (May 10) 2000,

Guess what? Samwise Gamgee's birthday is in exactly four days. I really can't wait, because knowing my cousin, Frodo will host a big birthday party at Bag End, and we'll all go for silly but amazing party games and snack on so much junk food and watch Sam open presents. It'll be such a laugh. 

We've got an English exam next week though so that's actually put a big downer on my previously giddy mood. The thing is, I'm supposed to be revising every single minute of every single day and it's driving me INSANE. My teacher said we should stop treating ourselves like GCSE machines and try to be more human- like MAKE time for ourselves and have some fun. My next day of fun that will never be dedicated to school work is obviously Sam's party, because I'll be hung over in the morning and my head will be throbbing too much to concentrate on petty revision. 

There's just too much pressure on us now at school, everything is about preparing for the stupid future. I still have no idea what I want to be when I'm older, it's ridiculous. I don't think any of us quite know where to go after college/university ends. We know roughly what path we want to be aiming at, but a specific job or profession is something that's still quite foggy to us. 

I'm kind of scared, honestly, as I really have no idea what's going to happen to me in the future. I'm not really good at anything. 

Merry would scoff at that, if he were here; which he isn't. This is... It's maddening knowing that I just spent a little over a week stitched -not literally- to Merry's side. We are completely inseparable when we're in the same environment/house/building. I just have this longing to live with him again. Living with the Brandybuck's was actually even better than I had hoped. 

I really hope Merry doesn't get sick of me anytime soon because I ain't leaving him.

\- Peregrin Took


	29. Year 2000- Sam's Birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was Sam's birthday today, and nothing short of a miracle happened.

Dear Diary, (May 14) 2000,

It was Sam's birthday today, and it was honestly one of the best parties I've been to. All the thanks must go to my beloved cousin Frodo, but that's no big surprise.

It was all cozily decorated at Bag End, and the home cooked food and our favorite music was what made it feel really like it should be. We ate Sam and Frodo's food- Sam insisted on helping- which tasted more than delicious, we danced crazily, we drank- no one needs to know about that- and told each other fantasy/horror stories at night.

Sam was grateful for every present, even getting US gifts when it was his frigging birthday. Frodo refused to accept it because even though he's an ass sometimes, he's still a gentleman... At least to Sam anyway.

Merry sneaked some pipes for us which Bilbo couldn't possibly confiscate, poor guy. He was just trying to keep us happy and we didn't smoke near him anyway. Not like it would've mattered a lot, Bilbo has smoked for decades. 

Also, guess what we found out? Legolas has completely recovered! Gimli messaged every single one of us that his best friend is in a healthy condition and is ready to go back to school and deal with the stupid pathetic tests he had missed. I didn't really think about that, I doubt anyone did, I'm sure we were all concentrating on the fact that our favorite archer is perfectly well and will be exactly like he was. 

I'm sort of not surprised that something like that happened on Sam's birthday. The guy is a miracle himself, so making a different miracle happen is exactly what he does. Every single one of Sam's birthdays something good always happens. I'm not surprised.

Everyone was as happy as anyone could be, and that's what mattered.

\- Peregrin Took


	30. Year 2000- Paler

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pippin's grateful that his mother like Merry a lot, but He's even more grateful that Legolas and Gimli won't fight anymore.

Dear Diary, (May 18) 2000,

Gimli was right. Legolas is back to his old self, well, near enough anyway. He's still a bit too pale, and he gets tired more easily which means his fights with Gimli have now subsided. Honestly I'm glad about that, mainly because they're best friends and shouldn't have to fight.

So the good news is out of the way, here comes the negative. My dad is 'concerned' that I'm not taking any interest in sports like wrestling and boxing. I think he wants me to turn into the dream son he's always wanted but I like me the way I am. I tried reassuring him that Merry and I wrestle quite a lot but he just scowled at me like that was the answer he definitely didn't want to hear.

I don't know what he's got against my cousin, but it must be something stupid. There's nothing wrong with Merry and my dad had to accept the fact that we need each other.

Mother likes Merry a lot. She told me in private that she's proud of me and that I should thank Merry for her. I didn't know why she wanted to thank him, but I did what I was told anyway. At least one parent appreciates my best friend.

\- Peregrin Took


	31. Year 2000- Aragorn's Stupid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aragorn can be a right pain sometimes, and just so happens not to be the brightest bulb in the box.

Dear Diary, (May 23) 2000,

Have I ever told you just how stupid Aragorn can be? If not, I'll tell you right now. 

It was in the cafeteria and he was having a not-so-decent meal with Arwen when one of his ex girlfriends came along and started being sickly sweet to Arwen. It was a bit patronizing in a way and it was clear that Arwen was VERY uncomfortable. Did Aragorn notice? Of course not! 

So, the ex girlfriend- I'm not good at names- sat herself right in between the couple and started stealing food from both of their plates. By then I could see that Arwen just had enough and wanted to leave, but it was also clear that she didn't to abandon Aragorn, who was actually chatting up his ex girlfriend. 

Honestly, to Aragorn's defense, he doesn't know when he's flirting or when he's not, it's like an impulse for him. It's as easy for him to flirt with ANYBODY as it is for him to breathe. I know it's ridiculous, and he should have noticed that Arwen was fed up and hurt.

It was sort of funny- no I did NOT laugh... At all- when Arwen stupid up abruptly from her chair, grabbed the nearest pot of gravy and half dunked it on the ex, the other half was thrown at Aragorn, who actually caught it.

It took a while for him to actually realized what happened, bless him, but when he did he dunked the remaining gravy on the ex's head. I didn't laugh then either, I swear.

Don't ask me how I know all that, because I don't normally watch other people, but Frodo saw Aragon's ex walk up to them, so we sort of watched it enfold from there.

So don't judge me.

\- Peregrin Took


	32. Year 2000- Losing The Plot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pippin reflects that his best friends are a bit insane, and why in Hell does he hang out with them?

Dear Diary, (May 26) 2000,

Arwen's alright now, in case you were wondering... Of course you weren't, you're just a book full of paper. I swear I'm losing it. Seriously, I can't keep my mind focused, I'm stupider than usual, I'm always in my own world and I've been spaced out from everything. I think I'm going insane. There are voices inside my head they talk ALL THE TIME. It's so frustrating, because I can't hear what they're saying.

Frodo sometimes speaks to himself, so I'm not the only one. You can literally hear him mumble the answer to his own question, or ask himself what he's got planned at home, which normally includes a lot of work. My older cousin has always been a bit weird and crazy, I sometimes think he has a mental illness. He doesn't.

Now Sam is probably the most sane of us all. Though, he gets worried about stuff too much, and is what you may call a perfectionist. He wears himself out with concern and that's when his insomnia kicks in and it's just horrible when he has something that resembles an anxiety attack. Yet he's still the most sane, and is probably the least important to worry about, bless him.

Merry's not insane. He just doesn't live in the best environments, which cause him to resort to smoking pipes, and sometimes stealing if I'm also up to it. We always steal from Farmer Maggot, who doesn't live that far away from where we live at all. He's got a lot of bad habits, and possibly poor sense of judgment sometimes, but he's definitely the smartest of us all.

Why do I hang around with these people?

\- Peregrin Took


	33. Year 2000- Fashion Sense

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pippin discusses everyone's fashion style, and that he's glad there is no school uniform.

Dear Diary, (June 1) 2000,

Summer is here! Well, technically Summer starts when its the twenty first of June, but still. It's got really warm now, and it's getting really hard to wear a long sleeved top. I normally just wear shorts, a T-shirt and my scarf, but Merry still wears his Godamned waistcoat. Now that I think about it, Sam wears one too on occasion, but not most of the time.

Frodo likes wearing baggy T-shirts so he can roll his sleeves up to his elbows, and hardly wears skinny jeans. We all look pretty good together to be honest, as everyone views us as a quartet. Nothing wrong with that, since Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas are a trio. 

Legolas wears fancy stuff, as you may expect. He may be the richest out of every single one of us, even Frodo. Out of the Baggins' and the Greenleaf's, I presume everyone favors the Greenleaf's, because most of the Baggins family are rather strange and a bit crazy.

Gimli has a peculiar style, I must admit, but I find it pretty awesome. He just normally goes with brown clothing, anything dark to be honest. He stands out pretty well in a crowd with his long ginger hair, and I swear he's older than he says he is, because that beard is growing. Not that I watch it or anything....

Aragorn looks pretty scruffy to be honest, but no one takes notice. He hardly combs his hair and looks completely poor and wreckless beside Legolas. It's pretty amusing.

Arwen comes from the same family as Legolas, but the connection between their families is rather distant and complicated and they don't act like they're family. They like each other, just don't spend enough time together or anything to actually have that bond.

Anyway, being from some sort of side to Legolas' family, Arwen wears pretty dresses and normally curls her long dark hair and wears it down, or a bun.

Everyone has their own fashion sense here, so thank God there is no school uniform.

-Peregrin Took


	34. Year 2000- Shopping Survival Kit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pippin hates shopping, but unfortunately the women in his family love it. Luckily he has Merry, and their Shopping Survival Kit.

Dear Diary, (June 6) 2000,

Shopping. A man's worst nightmare. It's just hours and hours of clothes, shoes (oh so many shoes!), window shopping (what's the point?!), and browsing. I think browsing is the worst. It's just hours of wasted time I could have used to do something more practical.

I despise shopping, as you might've guessed. My ma and aunty love it. The Big shop occurs once every month, and I dread it every day forthcoming. Sometimes five hours of my life is used to go to these awful shops. Luckily, tomorrow I will have Merry with me since his ma is coming with us. Honestly, I'd rather go with Merry's dad, I'm sure he will be doing something that is far more fun than what we have to endure.

Food shopping isn't so bad, but some aisles are just so cold! It doesn't matter how many layers you wear, it still gets to you. Ridiculous. But this time I am prepared. 

Ever since Christmas, Merry and I have been putting together a supply of every thing you would need to go through five hours of atrocious shopping. You may think we're exaggerating, but if you want to come shopping with our family, then we'd happily sit out.

Basically, we put tons of warm clothes, saved up money, packaged food, bottles of juice, a pair of handcuffs (trust me, at our shopping center, you can blink and lose everyone you came with), and our special iPods and earphones we only ever use on these occasions.

When we leave to go shopping tomorrow, oh man, we'll be ready.

\- Peregrin Took


End file.
